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Why is my sex drive so high?

Changes in sex drive, or libido, are normal. However, having a high sex drive can become a problem if it starts getting in the way of daily functioning.

It is important to note that there is no definition of a “normal” sex drive, and what one person sees as a high sex drive may seem normal to someone else.

Many people are curious about the nature of their sex drive. This article will explore some underlying causes of a high sex drive and provide some tips for controlling or reducing it.

What is sex drive?

two people making love after thinking why am i so horny
A person’s age and hormone levels may affect their sex drive.

Sex drive, otherwise known as libido, refers to a person’s desire for sexual activity and arises from the basic biological need to reproduce.

It is a normal feeling that anyone can experience, whether a person wants to reproduce or not.

Levels of libido exist on a spectrum, from no desire for sex at all to wanting to engage in sexual activity very often.

Having a high sex drive is not a problem unless it excessively preoccupies a person’s thoughts. For example, a person might wish to reduce their sex drive if it:

  • interferes with their work, social life, sleep, or health
  • affects their mental health
  • is difficult to feel satisfied, no matter how much sexual activity they have
  • affects the quality of their relationships
  • causes them to seek “risky” sex

Causes

What constitutes a normal sex drive differs for everyone, and people are likely to desire sex more at different times in their lives.

Sex drive depends on factors such as:

  • age
  • mental health status
  • energy levels
  • physical health status
  • relationship status
  • social interactions
  • medication, alcohol, or drug use

Age and hormones

Hormonal changes play a big role in sexual desire.

For young people, hormonal surges caused by puberty can trigger feelings of sexual desire for the first time. Hormones will continue to affect a person’s libido throughout their life.

Some older research also suggests a possible association between higher testosterone levels in men and having a higher sex drive.

Mental health

Stress levels can also influence how sexually charged a person feels.

In times of high stress, some people might feel low sexual desire, while others might seek sexual satisfaction as a stress reliever.

Physical fitness and energy levels

ResearchTrusted Source has found that physically fit people are more likely to desire sex and enjoy heightened arousal and better orgasms.

Relationships

Having enjoyable sexual experiences, either with others or through masturbation, might also lead to an increased desire for sex. Intimacy between sexual partners has been shown to have a significant effectTrusted Source on the male sex drive.

On the other hand, if a person is unable to feel satisfied — either through a lack of sex or unsatisfying sexual experiences — their sex drive might also increase.

Substance use

Alcohol consumption lowers inhibitions, which might increase libido in the short term. However, alcohol dependency might decrease sexual arousal, performance, and satisfaction.

The use of stimulant drugs, such as cocaineTrusted Source, may also increase sexual desire but has links to increased “risky” sex in men who have sex with menTrusted Source and in young adultsTrusted Source.

The female reproductive system

Sexual desire can fluctuate throughout the menstrual cycle and often peaks around the time of ovulation. This is when testosterone levels are at their highest.

Ovulation is the time in the menstrual cycle when sperm can fertilize an egg. So, biologically speaking, it makes sense for females to feel more desire for sex around this time, as they are usually more likely to become pregnant.

For those acting on their increased sexual desire at this time but not wishing to become pregnant, it is especially important to use contraception carefully.

The male reproductive system

High testosterone levels are also linked to high sex drive in men. Testosterone production is usually at its peak at around 17 years of age, and levels tend to remain high for 2–3 decades after that.

This is also peak time for masturbation as an outlet for satisfying sexual desire. As men age, however, their testosterone levels tend to decrease, which can lead to a decrease in sexual desire.

Is it possible to have too high a sex drive?

Having a high sex drive only tends to become problematic when it gets in the way of other important aspects of life or if a person feels compelled to seek sexual activity in a way that feels out of control. This is known as compulsive sexual behavior.

Sometimes, when the libidos of sexual partners are not compatible, it can cause friction in the relationship.

How to lower libido

For anyone worried that their sex drive is very high and needs addressing, there are some strategies that might help.

The following are some things to try to lower sex drive:

Try talking therapy

If having a high sex drive is making a person unhappy, a counselor can help them explore their thoughts, feelings, and desires around sex.

They can help the person find ways to manage their sexual desire and any issues associated with it.

Try distraction

Engaging in sexual activities, either with a partner or through masturbation, is likely to perpetuate the need for more sex. So, if a person is keen to lower their sex drive, it may be worth trying not to act on every sexual impulse.

Distracting the mind with some form of physical exercise or an absorbing task might help a person channel this energy elsewhere.

Allow time for a relationship

People with a lower sex drive may misinterpret any intimate gesture by the other as a bid to have sex.

It may help to agree to be intimate without having sex. For example, go on a date or give each other a massage to show care for the other person — not so that they are more likely to agree to have sex.

Consider medication

If other strategies do not seem to work, it may be worth talking to a doctor about possible next steps.

Certain medications, such as antidepressants, may lower libido. A doctor may also suggest changing or lowering any current medications, if this is what is causing the increased arousal.

Doctors may also suggest consuming anaphrodisiacs — such as soy, licorice, hops, and various herbs — that may help lower libido.

Summary

For most people, having a high sex drive is a perfectly natural part of life that comes and goes depending on many factors.

It is usually nothing to worry about, but if it is causing stress or affecting other parts of life, it may be worth trying to channel this increased sexual energy into a different activity.

In extreme cases, a person can try seeking professional help.

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